October 2024
let those who seek find
Preface
Greetings to all who have shown interest in this new magazine. If you are reading these lines, you are exactly the ones who feel pain when looking at the modern internet. You are certainly those who want to change something; each of you does this in your own way, dreaming of a return to the internet where it felt cozy and warm, where information had weight and value.
Once upon a time, the internet was a space for exploration, not an endless scrolling feed. Web 1.0 was a time when pages loaded slowly, but each brought something important and unique. No one was competing for likes and reposts, and websites didn’t turn into data stores about users. We created pages because we wanted to share information, not because algorithms demanded our activity. That internet may have been imperfect, but it was real—it was a network for people, not for corporations.
Today, when social networks dictate the rules and search engines turn into advertising machines, the small web is a breath of fresh air. It’s a world where there is still room for small websites, independent authors, and those who want to speak, not shout. In the small web, you won’t encounter pop-ups or thousands of bot comments—just the silence in which you can hear the thoughts of others. It’s a place where the internet becomes cozy, warm, and free again.
We are here to create an alternative. We are here to remind everyone that the internet can be different—like it used to be when information had weight and every site was an expression of creativity. This is a space for those who are tired of endless updates for the sake of updates, of the race for likes and followers. It’s a space for those who value depth over superficiality, and who seek meaning.
The name Elpis was chosen for a reason. This word carries a deep meaning related to hope and the expectation of something better. In ancient Greek mythology, Elpis is the embodiment of hope, the last, but no less important, of all the gifts left in Pandora’s box. And although all the troubles and sufferings escaped from the box, it was hope that gave people the strength to cope with them.
Elpis is a symbol of faith in a better future for the internet. It signifies that, despite all the problems of the modern network—loss of privacy, commercialization, the invasiveness of algorithms—we still have a chance to change the situation. Elpis is our anchor, our confidence that we can create a network that is not only convenient but also meaningful for all of us.
Many are already creating their sincere, personal corner of the web, where knowledge, ideas, and freedom reign. The small web is a reminder that the true value of the internet lies not in its scale, but in the meaning we put into what we create and do.
Welcome to a world where code matters more than trends, where dialogues matter more than clicks, and where everyone finds their path to an alternative web that has meaning. You are here for a reason, and this magazine is not just a collection of pages. It is a meeting point for those who believe in the future, who see the potential in returning the internet to its original purpose. Every step you take in this direction is important and valuable.
So bon voyage, friends, and safe travels!
Table of Contents
Obituary: Eternal Memory to the Geniuses of Computer Science
Why can't You just sit down and write?
Instructions for Dummies
Corporate Memphis and Skeuomorphism: The Decline of Design into Indifference
No Privacy! The Question of Confidentiality
Humorous Jokes About the Modern Internet from the Internet
Epilogue
### Obituary: eternal memory to the geniuses
of computer science
As 2024 comes to an end, we sadly witness the loss of several outstanding individuals who left their mark on the world of computer science and the internet. These people did not just make the world more technological; they changed our perception and interaction with information, leaving an indelible legacy behind.
Niklaus Wirth – a Swiss scientist and programming language developer. His work on the creation of the Pascal, Modula-2, and Oberon languages has had a profound impact on education in programming and laid the foundation for many modern languages.
Gordon Bell – a pioneer of minicomputers and one of the founders of Digital Equipment Corporation. His contribution to the development of the first successful minicomputers was crucial for the emergence of the personal computer.
Arvind Mithal – an outstanding MIT scientist, also left us in 2024. His research in parallel programming and the development of languages such as Id and pH formed the basis for many modern computing technologies.
David Mills – the creator of the Network Time Protocol (NTP), which still ensures the precise operation of many computer networks. Mills also participated in the development of TCP/IP, the fundamental protocol for the internet.
Peter Kirstein – a pioneer of the internet, who was involved in creating the first international connections of ARPANET and implementing internet protocols in the UK before they were adopted in the USA.
Peter Opsvik – a Norwegian industrial designer who contributed to the design of digital interfaces.
Grace Hopper – the mother of compilers, played a vital role in the development of programming and military electronics.
With the passing of such talented individuals, we lose not only their knowledge and experience but also a piece of history that shaped our present world. These minds have left us a legacy that will continue to live on, inspiring future generations of researchers and developers. May their memory be bright, and their ideas eternal.
### Why can't You just sit down and write?
I want to talk to you about something I think everyone can relate to — when you want to write something, but inspiration seems to have gone on vacation. You’re sitting in front of your computer, your coffee’s gone cold, and your mind is blank. At this point, you’re ready to close your laptop just to avoid staring at the empty screen.
In times like these, it’s common to blame the muse, but the muse isn’t your employee, and she doesn’t work by schedule. She’s more like a lazy freelancer who shows up when you least expect it.
You can’t just say, “Okay, I’m going to set aside half an hour, sit down, and inspiration will magically arrive.” Nope. The muse does what she wants, when she wants, and she’s not open to training.
She might show up when you're brushing your teeth or at 2 a.m. when you’re trying to fall asleep. And what’s most frustrating is that when you desperately need her, she’s nowhere to be found.
Trying to force the muse won’t work either. You might feel like you have inspiration, but the muse... she’s just not there.
Your brain isn’t a conveyor belt that churns out ideas on demand. It loves to be lazy and waits for you to relax. If you try to force yourself to think of something, your brain will start tossing out the weirdest ideas. Something like, “Hey, let’s write about how dogs howl at the moon at night?” Really, brain? Now?
And here’s the kicker — the muse is a notorious panicker. The more pressure you put on yourself, the faster the muse runs off. If you sit there all tense and worried, wondering where she is, she’s already slipped out the back door.
I’ve noticed that the best ideas come when you’re not thinking about them at all. For example, you go for a walk or get lost in your phone, and suddenly — bam! — an awesome idea pops into your head. The trick is to make sure you write it down before it slips away. It’s helpful to set up some kind of reminder system (send yourself a message on your phone, for example). It’s like having a ball of yarn: when you read your own message later, the yarn unravels, turning into sentences, paragraphs, and eventually, pages.
Planning doesn’t help either. If you sit down thinking, “Alright, now I’m going to come up with something brilliant,” you can be sure nothing great will come out. It’s better to let it go, do something else, and distract yourself. That always works. Sometimes you just need to switch off your brain: watch something funny, dance, go for a walk. The muse loves it when you’re not too serious and when you’re relaxed.
And sometimes — well, the day just isn’t working. Even the greatest writers spend hours staring at a blank page. It happens, and it’s totally normal.
I’ve heard of an interesting trick some famous writers use: set a timer for 15 minutes and just start writing anything. Don’t aim to create something great, just get the process going. Inspiration tends to show up at the most unexpected moments.
You don’t have to produce masterpieces every day. Sometimes, you just need to give yourself time, and the inspiration will come when you least expect it. Maybe tomorrow you’ll wake up with a brilliant idea, or maybe it’ll take a week, or a month — the important thing is not to pressure yourself.
Now, some of you might say, “But trendy bloggers release content on a regular schedule every week, cranking out articles like clockwork.” Well, let me tell you, most of that content is just filler, full of clichés and tricks to bulk it up. It’s not some kind of writing kung-fu or top-tier journalism. Far from it. If you read a few articles, you’ll start to see the similarities — they’re all written according to the same template, which gets reused from one article to the next. A lot of people mistake that for a ‘writing style.’ Later, you’ll learn to spot the quality, the “water content” in these articles. And sometimes, these trendy writers just hire freelancers...
So don’t rush to panic. Everyone goes through this. The main thing is not to take it too seriously. Humor helps, by the way. Even if the muse hasn’t come back, a few jokes will definitely lift your spirits. So don’t stress, flip through the magazine — I’ve already got a few waiting for you at the bottom.
### Instructions for Dummies
Vasya was the type of person who believed that instructions were for losers.
— I’m not some idiot! — he thought every time he unpacked another gadget. He was sure he had enough brains to figure things out. But one day, the moment came when this fool decided to tempt fate. Thus began a real war with his own stupidity.
The Beginning of the End: Smart TV
Vasya bought himself a smart TV. Modern, cool, with a ton of features and an app for control via his phone. He brought it home, unpacked it, and turned it on immediately.
— What’s there to set up? I plugged in two cables and let’s go! — Vasya was confident. The TV turned on, started demanding something, displaying errors, saying it needed to connect to Wi-Fi, register, and sync. Vasya, of course, knew nothing about all this; he didn’t read the instructions, why would he when he could figure it out himself? The TV flashed, rebooted, and offered to set up the internet. Vasya only got angrier and decided the TV was defective.
— Damn it! — Vasya fiddled with the ports, hoping that everything would magically work. The TV was indeed smarter.
A Grand Fail: Vasya and the Router
Before Vasya could process the episode with the TV, he decided to add another element to his "smart home" — a new router.
— This thing is easy to set up! — he reassured himself. Do you think he opened the instructions? Ha, of course not. He plugged in the router, connected the cable, and sat waiting. Waiting for the internet to magically appear. But the internet didn’t appear. Vasya was fuming, his frustration building, everything around him seemed crooked and stupid.
Half an hour passed, and there was still no internet.
— Damn!!! — Vasya yelled, deciding that his provider must have failed, and the router had nothing to do with it. He grabbed his phone to call support. Support told him he was ninety-sixth in line.
— What the hell! — our hero exclaimed and rushed to the router, jabbing at buttons just to make it work.
Broken Dreams: The Vacuum Cleaner
Okay, let’s assume the TV didn’t work, and the internet was also a bust, but Vasya didn’t give up. A robot vacuum cleaner entered the house. This thing would make life easier! What’s so complicated? It does everything itself! And he ignored the instructions once again. But this damn robot turned out to be an enemy from the very first second. Instead of cleaning, it immediately started crashing into walls, flipping over, getting stuck under the couch, and acting like a psycho. Vasya sat and watched, not understanding what the hell was going on. He was ready to smash the vacuum against the wall when suddenly it dawned on him — the instructions…
He opened the box, took out the little book, read the first page, and it turned out that the vacuum needed to be calibrated first, set virtual walls, and updated through the app. Damn it! An hour later, after wrestling with the app, everything seemed to work perfectly. The vacuum calmly rolled around the apartment, started cleaning, while Vasya sat with thoughts about how he could have avoided an hour of hysterics if he had opened the instructions right away. When Vasya went to bed, the vacuum escaped the house in an unknown direction.
How Vasya Realized He Was a Fool
Vasya was unpacking a new coffee machine, also smart, of course. After ten minutes, the coffee machine flooded his entire kitchen. Vasya couldn’t understand why a symbol was lighting up on the screen, clearly indicating a problem with water, yet no coffee was coming out! Well, maybe it was broken? Ha! The only thing broken here was Vasya. It turned out he just hadn’t pushed the water reservoir all the way in. And there he stood in his flooded kitchen, contemplating his endless brilliance.
Instructions aren’t for the weak; they’re for those who don’t want their lives to turn into hell.
One day, Vasya decided to create a website…
### Corporate Memphis and Skeuomorphism:
The Decline of Design into Indifference
In the last decade, we have witnessed how tastelessness has overshadowed all creative aspirations in the world of design. These terms sound loud and beautiful, but in reality, they represent merely trends that, it seems, were supposed to bring fresh air to our visual environment, but instead have filled it with banality.
Corporate Memphis is not just a style; it is a true plague for design. Drawing inspiration from outdated ideas and throwing them out in the form of “pretty” graphics and bright color palettes, design firms and companies seem to forget what true aesthetics consist of. It lies in harmony and meaningfulness.
Illustrations look as if they were created on a conveyor belt: strange and awful characters with unnatural bodies, thick legs, odd skin tones as if they’ve suffered from “bottling,” animated eyes, and frighteningly stupid smiles. These constantly repeating images do not inspire; they evoke nothing but disgust.
Skeuomorphism: A design that doesn't know when to leave
Skeuomorphism is a tribute to outdated technologies. Such designs impose upon us illusions of the real world: buttons, textures, and volumes that are not only overly excessive but also distracting, hindering users from interacting with the interface.
The best design is as little design as possible!
Many designers believe that by adding realistic elements, they make interfaces more understandable. In reality, this is just another confirmation that many of us are afraid to experiment. This leads to the creation of interfaces that resemble cardboard models from kindergarten instead of being functional and modern.
To avoid wasting energy on creating “cute” designs that no one needs, let’s return to the basics: simplicity, functionality, and cleanliness. Design should be not only beautiful but also convenient. It should inspire, not confuse or disgust.
The world is drowning in an ocean of repetitions, and the only way to fix this is by striving for true art and originality that revive ideas and fresh perspectives.
### No Personal Life!
The issue of privacy—protecting personal information from unauthorized access—has become one of the key questions in the social sciences of the 21st century. This, of course, is thanks to computers and computerization. There are two extreme views on the status of personal information. The dead privacy theory, relying on the development of e-commerce, surveillance methods, and data processing techniques, predicts the complete availability of an individual's personal information to anyone who wishes to access it. Opposing this are companies promising complete protection of personal information through powerful encryption tools.
The theory of dead privacy is championed by David Brin, an American science fiction writer in the cyberpunk genre. His arguments state that with the advent of computers, the government—and subsequently companies—gained the ability to monitor every movement of ours through undetectable bugs, create databases of these movements, and that advances in genetics, psychology, and advertising technology will allow predicting our future and influencing our actions. "Humanity will become more enlightened and happy by freeing itself from the medieval prejudice of personal information," says Brin in his article "The Transparent Society" in Wired magazine, "then everyone, including the government, will be accountable for their actions."
Many oppose this by advocating for personal freedom, which can be achieved through encryption tools just as it was fought for with weapons in times gone by.
Unfortunately, life is not inclined toward simplification. Both positions are too simplistic and radical to warrant implementation. The ambiguity of privacy status is confirmed by numerous problems whose solutions cannot be provided by either of these approaches.
1. Unsolicited Spam. Advertisers, like cockroaches, exploit every gap in your security to present their “long-awaited” gift—ads for their companies, service lists, or even several tons of conferences on “very interesting” topics. The problem of spam appears to be eternal and deserves a separate discussion; for now, let’s just see how it relates to our two theories.
Solution: Hide your real name from everyone, using digital pseudonyms when interacting with outsiders. However, you won’t receive any mail from people you don’t know; furthermore, the better you hide your coordinates, the more tempting a target you become.
Proponents of dead privacy, on the other hand, suggest giving everyone your address and as much information about yourself as possible in hopes that products you are not interested in will not be offered to you. But which advertiser would be too lazy to spam even for just one customer?
2. Medical Records. Abroad, many companies trade medical data of potential hires, leading to discrimination, that is, an unequal approach in hiring. A dead privacy approach will only harm here due to the medical incompetence of those making hiring decisions. On the other hand, in any unfortunate circumstance, I would not risk my life to protect my data from outsiders.
3. Genetic Data. The breakthrough in genetics that humanity stands on the brink of allows predicting diseases, intelligence, behavior, and many other personality traits from the genetic code. How this knowledge can turn against a person can be understood from already existing problems in medicine. Moreover, hiding your DNA is virtually impossible.
4. Law Enforcement Protection. On one hand, the state wishes to gain full access to all codes and conversations. History shows that this leads to nothing good except for totalitarianism. However, the ease with which any maniac can currently produce weapons, including chemical and biological ones, combined with privacy, allows such a maniac to strike before their intentions are recognized and prevented.
5. Intellectual Property. The development of e-commerce allows for paying for each reading of an article or running a program at minimal prices. This has reduced the cost of legal access to information for most consumers, but in order to monitor the integrity of the latter, it has become necessary to turn the computer into a supervisor.
Thus, alongside the information-rich and information-poor, a division has also emerged in the third millennium between those with high privacy and those with low privacy (privacy-rich and privacy-poor). Those who have something to hide will need to make an effort to ensure their own privacy.
### Jokes About the Modern Internet
- "The internet gave us a voice, but for some reason, everyone decided we must listen to every nonsense.”
- "Social media tells us, 'Be yourself!' but the algorithms respond: 'Be yourself, but please only in a format that's easy to sell.'"
- "Every time a social network offers a new design, I think it's a conspiracy by designers who can't stop.”
- "You never know when a philosophical note that just appeared in your feed was written... by someone sitting on the toilet.”
- "Drunken love messages on social media are like action movies: you know something will explode, but you don't know when.”
- "When they tell you 'The internet makes us smarter,' just remember that millions of people are watching videos of someone unboxing packages.”
- "I added a stunning beauty as a friend. She writes, 'Hey, handsome!' — and it's clear that soon the conversation will include a request to send money for 'helping mom.'”
- "Tinder is like a lottery. Only instead of money, you win disappointment.”
- "The girl from Instagram doesn't know she has a boyfriend, and not just one.”
- "Every second person on TikTok is a psychologist. It sounds like a diagnosis: 'Hey, why don't you watch this dance and realize that your entire childhood went to waste!'”
- "LinkedIn is the only social network where you can feel like a professional without doing absolutely nothing.”
- "Facebook is like a high school reunion, but every day.”
- "Once, the internet was about knowledge; now it’s about how to properly swallow a spoonful of cinnamon.”
### Epilogue
Every page of this magazine is a step toward finding alternatives, responding to the challenges of our time, and trying to regain the warmth and meaning we once felt online. We may not save the entire internet, but our little corner will remain a place for those seeking something more than just an endless stream of news and advertisements. Time goes on, technologies change, but the desire for simplicity, sincerity, and substance remains with us.
Thank you for visiting these pages. See you in the next issue.
prepared by: Turboblack